Chanukah Reflection: The Servant

BS"D

I dedicate these divrei Torah:L'ilui nishmas (to elevate the souls) of Aliza bas Sarah ob"m and her three children, taken too soon in a fire accident just a few days ago...As a Refuah Sheleima for their survivors - husband and father Yoseif ben Ahuvah Masuda, children Shilat bas Aliza, Avraham ben Aliza, Daniel ben Aliza, and their cousin - and for nechama and koach for them in this indescribably difficult time. 
Please daven or recite Tehillim for them.  Just as Hashem made miracles for us in the past, so may He make another miracle for them today.

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The following thought is a mashal (parable) of my own, discovered and refined this Chanukah:

The Chanukiyah (or Menorah) stands patiently, beside either oil or candles according to custom, longing to be kindled alight with holy flames. 

The little wax candles or cups of oil are identical and jumbled.  Neither bearer of light knows who's going to be chosen to play what role.  Who will be the Shamash, the servant torch?  Who will be grouped into the 8 counting lights?

At long last, the lighter arrives to the table by the window, where the Chanukiyah and its supplies are waiting.  His hand reaches down, carefully selecting which will serve as Shamash, and which will stand in the 8.  Then, he takes the match, strikes it, and ignites the channels of light.  The Chanukiyah glows richly, each detail illuminated and endowed with a purpose.

So it is with us - Am Yisrael, the rest of the world, and Ribono Shel Olam.

Who are we really?  We're human beings, created b'tzelem Elokim (in G-d's image) exactly like the rest of civilization.  Is there more to our identity than that though?  Of course.  You may have heard that Am Yisrael is called "the Chosen People," but one might ask "Is this arrogant?  Is this egotistic?  Superficial, or even, G-d forbid, racist?"

Absolutely not. 

What if one responded that this concept and belief truly emanated from Hashem Himself?  Prior to Matan Torah (the Giving of the Torah), Hashem asked all the nations of the world if they would preserve a gift and law, the Torah that He offered them.  Yet each one declined, until Hashem reached Bnei Yisrael.  At this proposal we cried out "Na'aseh v'nishma - We will do and we will listen," in total acceptance of the undertaking and privelege.  It's a declaration that echoes throughout all our generations and ages.  Matan Torah, the Giving of the Torah, is compared to a wedding between Am Yisrael and Ribono Shel Olam, for it was then that we pledged a wholehearted and unbreakable devotion to Hashem, Who in turn swore His unwavering support, love and guidance.  This sentiment was reiterated by Moshe Rabbeinu before his passing (preceding Bnei Yisrael's entrance to Eretz Yisrael), when he said:

"Hayom hazeh nih'yayta l'am la'Hashem Elokecha/This day you have become a people to Hashem your G-d."  {Devarim 27:9}

The Torah once more testifies to our attachment with Hashem:

"V'amarta el-Paroh: 'Ko amar Hashem 'B'ni B'chori Yisrael.'' - And you shall say to Pharaoh: 'So said the Lord: 'Israel is My firstborn son.''"  {Shemos 4:22}

This is not at all about ego.  We do not say we are better than other people.  There are all different kinds of characters in every group...  Rather, we are called "Chosen", for we've been charged with a sacred mission.  We teach, learn and inspire; we build, fix and create; we grow...  But the essence of all we do, is to elevate the world around us.  We must find Hashem and His Divine Light, in everything we do and everywhere we go; even in the physical and material, the dark, tragedy or challenge, and return the sparks to Him.  We must draw Hashem into the picture of the churning sea of our world, "bring heaven down to earth," and transform the world into a Garden for G-d.

The role of the Shamash in lighting the Chanukiyah, is that it kindles the other candles.  How often it is forgotten to be mentioned, while everyone relays the story of the famous 8...  But is it demeaning to be a servant?

Hashem surveyed all the nations of the world, like many colorful candles, each bearing potential to be messengers of light.  But which would be His faithful servant?  "Neir Hashem Nishmas Adam - Man's soul is G-d's candle..." {Mishlei 20:27}  Finally, Hashem's eyes, so to speak, rested upon us.  He said "I choose YOU."

It is said that we, the Jewish People, are to be "a light among the nations."  We must be a fitting example for others at all times, and in everything we do, and among any crowds, we have the opportunity to make a Kiddush Hashem (Sanctification of G-d's Name).  We are selected by, and diligently perform the work of our Master, our Creator, and our Lighter.  Once we've been ignited, fused with a fiery soul, and are guided with a profound purpose, it is in our hands to kindle the souls of others.

Traditionally, the Chanukiyah is designed with the Shamash elevated above all the rest of the flames.  When you bend before Hashem's will you are, paradoxically, free, unlimited, and unique from the rest.  When you serve Hashem, taking all you have - your gifts, energies, inner light and very being - and offer it all up in your Avoda to Him, you can truly reach no higher. 

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May we all embrace and make pnimiyut (integrate) the light, strength and miracles of Chanukah, to last all year round.  Chanuka Sameach, love and blessing to all, as we conclude the Festival of Lights.

Parshat Vayishlach Reflection: "The Apple Doesn't Fall Far from the Tree..."

BS"D

I dedicate this parsha post as a zechus for a blessed and speedy refuah sheleimah for Yitzchok Levi HaKohen ben Daniel Avraham.

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The whole of Sefer Bereishis, the Book of Genesis, is dedicated to relaying to us the lives and legacies of our Forefathers and Foremothers.  Every one of their actions, and every occurrence in their lives, are a portent for the future... for their descendants... for us.  This is hinted to us explicitly - in fact twice - in this parsha!  Let's learn.

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Flipping back to Parshat Toldos:  Immediately after Yaakov exited his father Yitzchak's tent, joyful and content after having been blessed so specially, Eisav entered bearing his freshly-prepared delicacy, and demanded the blessing of the firstborn.  Yitzchak was seized with violent trembling as he realized how he'd been deceived, and he was fearful of a terrible consequence to his mistake.  Still, he affirmed that, now with his knowledge, Yaakov was to remain blessed.

Eisav responded with a grievous cry, and struggled to accept the finalization of the blessing's transmittal, which was 'rightfully' his.  He begged his father to bentch him too.  Yitzchak replied:

"Vayomer 'Ba achicha b'mirma vayikach birchasecha.' - He said 'Your brother came with cunning and he took your blessing.'"  {Bereishis 27:35}

In recognition of the negative connotation borne by "mirma - cunning," Rashi brings down from Onkelos and the Midrash that this actually means 'b'chochma - with wisdom'... of the Torah.
Returning to Vayishlach, the present parsha of our discussion, we recount the tragic episode of Dina, the daughter of Leah and Yaakov.  After Yaakov's charged reunion with Eisav following his many years of exile away from his family and homeland, Yaakov and his household journeyed forth alone, settling in Shechem.  After a brief period of relative peace, it happened that one day while the men of Bais Yaakov were away and preoccupied with studies...:

"Vateitzay Dina bas-Leah asher yaldah l'Yaakov liros bivnos ha'aretz - Dina went out, the daughter of Leah, whom she had borne to Yaakov, to see the girls of the land."  {Bereishis 34:1}

(The Lubavitcher Rebbe of righteous memory teaches in one of his sichos (talks), that Dina wasn't simply gallivanting off to mingle with the girls of this disreputable city.  Rather, she ventured forth beyond her holy tent, in order to come to other young ladies and exert a positive influence on them in a genuine and charismatic way.  Her goal was to spread around, and instill within them the truth and wisdom so passionately taught in the House of Jacob.  She sought to kindle the light of kedusha and Yichud Hashem amongst whomever she could.  But this, my dear friends, is a jewel of wisdom saved for another conversation.  You can learn this Chiddush of Chassidus at greater length here.)

While Dina walked the streets of the city, she was seen by Shechem, the governor of the city's son.  He desired her, kidnapped her, was close with her, and maltreated her.  When word of the terrible news, that the beautiful tzadekes daughter of Yaakov was abused, her brothers were overcome with righteous outrage.  Curiously, after Shechem mistreated Dina so, he actually grew real feelings of sensitive love for her.  Perhaps with remorse for his inappropriate and rash behavior, he requested of his father Chamor to contact Yaakov, concerning a formal marriage and the bride-price for Dina's hand.  Chamor popped the proposal, including the suggestion that the Jewish People intermarry with his, and a promise that the land before them would be open for their settlement.  The two nobles assured them that they were prepared to pay even the highest prices for their desire to be granted.

"Vaya'anu v'nei-Yaakov es-Shechem v'es-Chamor aviv b'mirma vaydabeir asher timay eis Dina achosam - The sons of Yaakov answered Shechem and his father Chamor with cunning when they spoke, because he had defiled their sister Dina."  {Bereishis 34:13}

Yaakov's sons explained that they were forbidden to allow their sister to marry a man without a Brit Milah, and the only possible way to allow this, including the detail of intermarriage, would be for all the males of the place to be circumcised as Bais Yaakov was.  However, there was one catch here that Yaakov's sons didn't let on, as they spoke up, joining the exchange between the two fathers:  No matter what pleasant deals were proposed by Shechem and Chamor, the shameful actions had been committed, and there was no return.  All of civilization is bound by the Sheva Mitzvos Bnei Noach (the Seven Noahide Laws) which include the prohibition of immoral relationships.  One who oversteps this basic law of human decency is liable for capital punishment.  The inhabitants of the city were also found guilty, since none opposed Shechem's forbidden conduct, and they thereby also broke the Noachide law to administer justice.  Yaakov's sons allowed Shechem and his people to undergo the Brit Milah, as it provided a merit and tikkun (rectification); since it is taught that Milah negates physical desires, Shechem could partially amend his failure in this area through the mitzvah.  But the Torah continues, that on the third day, the most difficult and painful point after circumcision, Yaakov's 2nd and 3rd oldest sons Shimon and Laivi, took their swords and ransacked the vulnerable, weakened city, slaying every male, and ultimately releasing their sister from captivity and returning her home.

Although the words of Yaakov's sons were smooth and agreeable outwardly, they understood that retribution had to be meted out.  While they appeared to acquiesce to the noblemen's proposal , they indeed contemplated the instruction of Torah within.  When they spoke... it was "b'mirma - with cunning."  Refer back to Yitzchak's discussion with Eisav, and notice, that Yitzchak used the exact same word to describe Yaakov's actions!  Yaakov came unto his father b'mirma, and many years later, his sons also spoke to the corrupt rulers b'mirma!  The children mirrored their father in their devotion to Torah wisdom, to work diplomatically when dissolute people were concerned, and solve challenges.

This is reflection between parent and child is not restricted to the men, but the Torah also gives us an example with women.  Rochel Imeinu, Mama Rochel, was unable to bring a child into the world for many years.  Her desire was so strong, and she expressed her suffering to Yaakov, equaling a lack of children to spiritual death.  After a heated exchange, they reached a conclusion to dissolve Rochel's maidservant Bilhah's status as a servant, so that she might wed Yaaov, and Rochel would "be built up" through her.  After observing Bilhah's two births, Leah desired to give her maidservant Zilpah to Yaakov, also as a wife, so that she might take part too in bringing another part of Bais Yaakov into the world.  Zilpah mothered two sons, and Rochel was still yet barren.

"Vayeilech Reuvain bimei k'tzir-chitim vayimtza duda'im basadeh vayaveh osam el-Leah imo vatomeir Rachel el Leah 'T'ni-na li miduda'ei b'naich.' -- Reuvain went in the days of the wheat harvest and found jasmine flowers in the field.  he brought them to Leah, his mother.  Rochel said to Leah, 'Please give me some of your son's jasmine flowers.'"  {Bereishis 30:14}

Some say that jasmine flowers induce fertility; thus, Rochel requested some, hoping that, combined with her endless prayers, would prove to be an effective cure and an end to her suffering.  Leah initially appears to be slightly annoyed.  She implied, that first Rochel became her rival concerning Yaakov, and on a note of incredulity questioned how she now asked for her special blossoms too.  The sisters spoke and reached a deal:  In exchange for the duda'im, Rochel was to forfeit that night, which was her designated night with Yaakov, to her sister.

"Vayavo Yaakov min-hasadeh ba'erev vateitzay Leah likraso vatomeir 'Aylai tavo ki sachar s'charticha b'duda'ei bni' vayishkav imah balaiyla hu. -- Yaakov came home from the field in the evening, and Leah went out to meet him.  She said 'You will come to me, for I have hired you with my son's jasmine flowers," and he was with her that night."  {Bereishis 30:16}

Leah had a purpose, and a strong desire to fulfill it to the utmost:  She was a mother of  Bnai Yisrael, and she always strove for the opportunity to build it herself, and increase her share whenever possible.  She gave birth to six of the twelve tribes, equivalent to the rest of the other wives' offspring put together!  So eager she was, that she exerted herself to go out and greet Yaakov, and welcome him into her tent.  (And that very night, Hashem granted her wish; she conceived another child!)  "Vateitzay Leah - And Leah went out..."  Vateitzay, vateitzay...  Doesn't it sound familiar?  Look back, and above:  The Torah illustrates Dina's ventures as "Vateitzay Dina - Dina went out."  Dina was a girl who also possessed a strong drive and grace as her mother; Leah's outgoing persona was mirrored by her child, and perhaps on an even greater scale.  Rashi actually declares, in their praise, that these two women are the source of the expression "K'imah k'bitah - Like mother, like daughter!"

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The examples we've given today are very specific and are clearly observed to be reflections between those as close as a parent and their children.  But we, too, are the children of the Avos and Imahos.  Their spiritual strength and character traits are inherent, and so often manifested within us.  They sojourned and journeyed almost endlessly; we therefore have the courage and strength to live as "wandering Jews," for there is no place in this world for us of permanent residence and tranquility, until the coming of Moshiach.  How can we ever withstand the relentless pressures and temptations of a world in denial of G-d surrounding us?  Our ancestors were the "Ivrim"...  those who crossed over to the other side, against the crush of humanity, and stood strong for their faith, belief and heritage.  It's all in our "spiritual DNA."  I guess you could really say in this case that "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree..."

May we always merit to draw chizuk and guidance from the legacies of our forbears, and make them and Hashem proud by emulating their ways.

Parshat Toldos Reflection: First Come, First Served?

BS"D

I dedicate this parsha post as a zechus for a refuah sheleima for Devora Rudya bas Fraida Gila.

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The following is a Chiddush of my own, that I discovered last Erev Shabbos.

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We all know the famous tale of Yaakov and Eisav, Jacob and Esau.  After twenty years of barrenness, Rivkah at last gave birth-- to twins!  The elder was born, an unusual little one developed with hair, and his parents called him Eisav.  The younger emerged grasping his brother's heel; they named him Yaakov.  The boys grew up much alike, and only when they neared spiritual adulthood, did their dominant inclinations lead them down their split respective paths for life.  Eisav was wild and pursued his passions, and honed his skills as a hunter.  His base deeds and activities, mirroring those of his uncle Yishmael, were what his life revolved around, and he was drawn to the temples of idol worship.  Yaakov, at the other end of the spectrum, grew into a master of Torah, yet was a student of it his whole life.  He was a tzaddik, and destined to become the progenitor and pillar of the Jewish People.

It so happened that one day, Eisav returned home from a bloody hunt, famished and fatigued, when he observed Yaakov tending to a pot of lentil stew.  (Why was this on the menu for the day?  It was in fact the day Avraham, the patriarch, passed on from this world, in hoary age and contentment.  Yaakov was preparing lentils, a customary dish of mourners, for his father Yitzchak.)  Exhausted beyond capacity to even serve himself, Eisav addressed Yaakov "Haliteini na min ha'adom ha'adom - Give me, please, a swallow of this red stuff."  Yaakov wondered silently in distress if this coarse, gluttonous man would really be the one entrusted with the birthright, merit to serve G-d with holy service such as the sacrifices, and blessed with an exclusive blessing.  He realized this could not be so; Eisav was not worthy of such a privilege and responsibility to G-d!  Eisav further proved his younger brother's unspoken point when he acquiesced to his proposal, of selling the birthright to the latter in exchange for the lentil stew, initially cooked for their father.  "Eisav thus scorned the birthright." {Bereishis 25:34}

Transmittal of the birthright was of tremendous value, and indeed something taken very seriously at the time.  Yitzchak, unaware of his elder son's unworthiness, was prepared to bestow upon him the coveted prerogative.  How, then, was Yaakov to come and claim what was now legally his, without his father's knowledge?  This is where Rivkah entered the scene.  She, through a prophecy foretold to her through Ruach haKodesh when she carried her children in her womb, knew Eisav's genuine character.  She created a plan to ensure that it would indeed be the righteous Yaakov who'd receive the eternal blessing that was paired with the birthright.  She dressed the smooth-skinned Yaakov in rough goat skins to mimic Eisav's hairiness.  She prepared the delicacy that Eisav had been commissioned to make to bring in to his father, 'so that his soul would bless him' in a content and pleased state.  Yaakov entered into his father's tent under two shadows allowing his concealment:  Eisav was out hunting for game to cook for his father, and therefore knew nothing of the scheme; and secondly, Yitzchak's blindness inhibited him from recognizing just what son he was blessing.  It was all part of the Divine Plan that Yaakov receive these brachos.

When Yaakov's intimate time with his father concluded, just as he slipped out of the tent, Eisav entered through the opposite door.  Had the elder spotted the younger imposing as himself, he would've surely slain in him in his fury; Yaakov's life was spared by a hairsbreadth.  The real Eisav told his father to sit, served him the dish he cooked, and demanded his bracha.  Yitzchak was perturbed, and suddenly seized by violent trembling, as he realized what happened:  He had been deceived into giving Yaakov the blessing.  However, he declared that he remain blessed.  He relayed to Eisav the events that had occurred.  Eisav cried out with heartrending bitterness, and asked:

"'Hachi kara sh'mo Ya'akov?  Vayakveini zeh pa'amim; et b'chorasi lakach v'hinei ata lakack birchasi.'  Vayomar 'halo atzalta li b'racha?' -- 'Is he not rightly called Yaakov?  He has deceived me twice; he took my birthright and now he has taken my blessing.'  He said, 'Have you not saved a blessing for me?'"  {Bereishis 27:36}

I picked up on something interesting here...  The words "b'chorasi - my birthright" and "birchasi - my blessing" share the same root letters:  Beis/ב, Chaf/כ, and Reish/ר  (bechor/בכר - birthright; barech/ברכ - bless).  Therefore, the roots have equivalent gematrios (numerical equivalents).  Perhaps this connection signifies to us, that the privilege of the birthright and the blessing, we're both indeed unified and one.

Eisav was a man of lusts and material gratification.  His desirous traits allowed no room for patience and abstinence.  If it was something he couldn't acquire to immediately subdue his passion, or if a benefit wasn't measurable, sensual and tangible, then he was simply unable to find worth in it.  "Vayivez Eisav et hab'chora - (Thus) Eisav scorned the birthright."  {Bereishis 25:34}  The principal value of the Bechora was spiritual; furthermore, the majority of the honors it merited would be allotted at distant times ahead.  But Eisav's gaze was not set towards the future, for he was a man of "the here and the now."  Little did he know, in his lack of sensitivity, that when he casually sold the 'worthless' birthright status, he simultaneously forfeited his blessing.

On the other hand, a believing and trusting Jew is willing to wait.  Although clear and obvious blessing may at times be hidden from our limited human perception, we know that we are the Chosen Ones, as Hashem says of us in the Torah: "Yisrael (another name for Yaakov) is My firstborn."  We're loved and cherished by Hashem, forever and always.  The Jewish People are no strangers to suffering and Divine discipline, though...  Jewish history is rampant with pain, loss, persecution and tragedy.  Yet, by G-d's grace, we are still here, still standing, still growing and passing on the heritage.  Look carefully once more at Yitzchak's blessing, and you will note that he prophetically warned his son Yaakov, future father of the Klal Yisrael, that immense trials lay ahead.

"Or'reiycha arur, um'varacheiycha baruch - Those who curse you are cursed, and those who bless you are blessed."  {Bereishis 27:29}

Rashi notes the order of the verse, and inquires why the negative, the curse, is mentioned prior to the positive of the blessing.  He explains that it is common for the wicked to lead tranquil lives in this world, but their end is met with only curse and pain.  Oppositely, a tzadik, a righteous person, is usually challenged with struggles and bitterness during his life, but ultimately rewarded with true and eternal blessing and peace.  In the wording of his blessing, Yitzchak hinted to Yaakov that his children, all righteous, would have to endure astonishing suffering.  But he also promised, and we must always hold fast to our belief, that there is indeed a bright light at the end of this dark tunnel.

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Your children are waiting for You, Hashem, and our Geulah (Redemption).  We're not giving up.  But we're ready for the brighter days You've promised.  We're Your firstborn child... and we're ready to come home.

Parshat Chayei Sarah: It's the Little Things that Count

BS"D

Gut Erev Shabbos to all dear readers!

I dedicate this parsha post as a zechus for a blessed and speedy refuah sheleimah for Rochel bas Daniella Dshoar and Elisheva Yehudis bas Yael Devora.  May Hashem heal, strengthen and bless all the ill and broken of Klal Yisrael in the merit of Shabbos Kodesh.  Please keep them in your prayers.

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A quick note before we begin:  Every year, it usually takes me the whole winter season to adjust to the early candle-lighting times we now have, and considering the time I'm making today, I only have time to share with you a brief and rather informal post this week.  But still, we'll cover a few beautiful core themes and ideas in the parsha, and of course draw true and lasting spirit from the script.  It's an incredible, bursting Parsha this week; I encourage everyone to read it when they have the chance!  Let's learn!

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The beautiful, detailed narrative, of Eliezer servant of Avraham's encounter with Rivka, gives us a peek into the very genuine, personal conduct of one of our Mothers.  Rivka was, as the Midrash describes, "a rose amongst the thorns"; her pure and precious soul was unaffected by the abrasive, unpleasant, idolatrous society around her, and she stood strong in her character and morals against the stifling current.

When Eliezer asked her for a drink, the Torah explains that she lowered her pitcher from her shoulder to her hand, before Eliezer drew near to have a sip.  The Torah doesn't waste words, and our Sages teach that this detail hints to her tzniyus conduct when serving a man.   Flipping forward (spoiler approaching!), to when Eliezer arrives back t o his master's home with Rivka, the bride, in tow, Yitzchak was out in the field davening.  Rivka glimpsed her Chatan, and not yet knowing who the stranger in the field was, addressed Eliezer "Who is that man coming towards us?"  When Eliezer answered that it was Yitzchak, Rivka covered herself with a veil.  She was modest.

Rashi shares with us that at the well, before Eliezer approached Rivka, he observed that the waters rose and surged towards her when she drew near.  He then ran to her in excitement, thinking this was indeed a sign from Hashem, that this was the girl who he was searching for.  Although her task was sped up by this miracle, Rivka didn't dawdle at the well, squandering time with the other young women gossiping, as was popular custom.  She performed her task with alacrity and focus.  Furthermore, the Torah details "vat'maheir - she quickly lowered her pitcher from her shoulder", in her haste to nourish the thirsty traveler who sought her help.  She then ran untiringly to and fro, providing the man's camels with water until they were satiated.  After Eliezer gave her the gifts of jewelry, and asked her who her family was, "vataratz - she ran" to relay to her mother's household the events that had just occurred.  Just as fitting for Avraham's family who ran, to serve guests and to carry out Ratzon Hashem, she possessed zrizus.

After Rivka had watered Eliezer, his men, and his camels, Eliezer inquired first as to who her family was, and secondly, if they had room for him to stay the night.  Rivka replied in the manner that Pirkei Avos declares befitting for a wise person:  She answered his first question first, and last lastly.  She was organized and refined in her speech.  She was skilled in communication.

Rivka's soul-qualities shone profoundly through her deeds.  These are but a few of the numerous examples of Rivka's exemplary character, so evident through the 'little things' she did!  Someone was watching her carefully, and indeed, it was her attention to the nuances of her interactions with the people around her, and the way she carried herself, that made her meritorious of being Divinely chosen to rise as the next mother of the Jewish People.  Her examples are eternally recorded in the Holy Torah, to learn and draw a flood of inspiration from.  Your actions and words, no matter how seemingly 'insignificant', all truly have a tremendous impact on your personal self, the society around you, and ultimately the world; and through them, you define who you really are.  It just takes one mitzvah at a time, one little spark after another...  Remember, too, that  Someone is always watching us... "The Book is always open... the eye sees... the hand writes..." {Avot}, and no deed goes unrecorded, no mitzvah unrewarded.

We also see how the concept of how the "little things" are what build and define our characters, can be applied to Lavan, Rivka's brother, and diametric opposite.  After Eliezer told his story, and made his proposal to Rivka's family, "vaya'an Lavan u'Vesueil - Lavan and Besueil (Rivka's father) answered" in the affirmative, acknowledging the Hasghacha Pratis (Divine Providence) of the discovery and match, exclaiming "May'Hashem yatzah hadavar - the matter emanated from Hashem!"  Rashi castigates Lavan as a Rasha, a wicked person.  How come?  The simple secret is in the verse:  "Vaya'an Lavan u'Vesueil"-- Lavan interrupted, and spoke up before his father, an act that isn't praiseworthy.  We must treat our parents with the utmost respect, and interrupting certainly detracts from their honor.

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What does Hashem have in store for each and every one of us?  It's one of the few things obscured from our knowledge.  However, we can co-write our destiny.  Where do you want to go in life?  How will you grow on your journey to get there?  Like Rivka, you can become someone so great-- and you are already!  It is up to you to pave your way to your true self, brick by brick, step by step, change by change, spark by spark.

My Open Prayer for One of Hashem's Missing Children

BS"D

Dedicated to Jesse Galganov (Chaim Yosef ben Aliza) with a prayer from the heart...

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Hashem, Ribono Shel Olam...  Your children cry to you from konphot ha'aretz, the corners of the earth, and we're united in agony and bated breath, praying to you from the depths of our heart.

Please Hashem, let our tefillos not come before you too late; we pray that this not be a prayer in vain...

Please save and protect Chaim Yosef ben Aliza from all danger, harm, distress and misfortune.  Please be by his side, his faith and strength, no matter where he is.  Just as you protected Sarah Imeinu in the decadent palaces of Paroh and Avimelech, please bring forth her grandchild, Your child, Hashem, from this disaster untouched.

Please instill Chizuk and Emunah within Chaim Yosef, his family, and all the brave people who are searching for him.  Hashem, everything we may try, and every step of our search, is futile without Your blessing and intervention.  When Hagar had practically given up on her child Yishmael, who was in mortal danger in his illness and thirst, you heeded the lad's call, and opened Hagar's eyes to what was always present before her:  Your life-sustaining waters, the cure and salvation.  "Vayifkach Elokim et-aineyha vateireh b'eir mayim... - Then G-d opened her eyes and she perceived a well of water..." {Bereishis 21:19}.  Please G-d, may You make such a miracle for us; open our eyes to Your kindness and salvation!  Show us the way, and sustain our beloved Jewish brother, even if he is walking in the "valley of the shadow..."

Please protect and save Chaim Yosef ben Aliza.  He, like every Jewish child, was named with a degree of nevua (prophecy), as we are taught...  Chaim Yosef ben Aliza:  Chaim, Hashem, for the beautiful path of life You have set before him, in all its practically infinite possibility and opportunity.  Please do not take this away, and sustain and strengthen him to traverse the path of life that You've laid before him, in all its chapters, its highlights and rough-spots...  Yosef, Hashem, as You released Yosef haTzadik from the prison.  Please Hashem, redeem him from whatever confinement he may be in!   "Baruch Atah Hashem... matir asurim - Blessed are You, Hashem... Who releases the bound."  Ben Aliza, Hashem, for we plead with You that he comes forth from this in light and life, and that he become the son of our joy, the heart of our joyful laughter and cries of gratitude to you!

In times of danger, Hashem, the Satan always accuses...  Please, may Your Divine Rachmanus override any other force.  Forgive, please, and cleanse us of any of  aveiros or shortcomings that might incline You to decree dark or bitterness for Your people.  Please help us to acknowledge where we must grow and improve, guide us to do so, for we can only do it with Your assistance, to grow ourselves, and make ourselves worthy of Your salvation.

Although we are as nothing before You Hashem, please, bring us over the threshold, the final hill, to Redemption.  Hashem, the suffering and pain is becoming far too great...  How much more can we survive?  Please, bring us into the Ultimate Geulah!  Reunite us with all our loved ones, and draw us close, Your children, to You.

May the cries, tears, prayers, efforts make their mark before Your Heavenly Throne.  "Avinu Malkeinu, kabeil b'rachamim uv'ratzon es tefilaseinu - Our Father, Our King, accept- with compassion and favor- our prayer."

"So may it be His will, and let us say Amein."

Jesse (Chaim Yosef) Galganov, with his mother Alisa (Aliza) Clamen[/caption]

Parshat Vayeira: Giving Room to Run... and Grow

BS"D

Good Shabbos to everyone!

I dedicate these divrei Torah as a zechus for a blessed and speedy Refuah Sheleima for Rochel bas Daniella Dshoar.

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In the closing of last week's parsha of Lech Lecha, Hashem commands Avraham to circumcise himself, and all the males of his household, uniting with Him in a covenant of devotion, that is treasured and resolutely upheld to this day amongst Am Yisrael.  Along with this mitzvah bestowed upon the first Jew, G-d also delivered wondrous news-- Avraham and Sarah would finally be blessed with a child, whom they would name Yitzchak.

Flip to the opening of this week's sidra of Vayeira...  and Avraham is resting at the opening of his tent, on the third day after his milah, when the pain has reached its peak.  Furthermore, it was an unusually scorching day.  Hashem had caused the weather to take this turn, so that no traveler would be out, and arrive at Avraham's tent, disturbing him in his state of discomfort.  We may ask why Avraham was sitting outside to begin with.  Rashi explains this pattern of behavior, teaching that Avraham was indeed searching the path for wayfarers who he could beckon into his home and serve.  Avraham's inborn soul of Chesed, lovingkindness, coursed through him with such mastery, that even in spite of his pain from the milah, he was unstoppable.  He was ready to host others, nurture them, and ultimately sanctify Hashem's name with them, to the point that he personally sought them out!

Hashem witnessed Avraham's anguish at the lack of one of his greatest joys-- guests, that came his way-- so He sent him a surprise.  Hashem had charged a trio of malachim (angels) with three separate missions:  One (Michoel) to give the besoros tovos, good tidings, that Sarah would give birth to a child in the next year; one (Gavriel) to overturn the degenerate Sedom and its sister cities; and one (Refael) to heal Avraham (and later, to save Lot-- healing and saving are considered to be two actions of the same category).  To please and comfort Avraham, Hashem had them descend and approach him after assuming the appearances of human beings, travelers, and potential guests.

"Vayisa aiynav vayar v'hinei sh'losha anashim nitzavim alav; vayar vayaratz likrasam mipesach ha'ohel vayishtachu artzam. - Hi lifted his eyes and saw, and behold, three men were standing near him; He saw (them), and ran from the door of the tent to greet them, and he bowed down to the earth."  {Bereishis 18:2}

Rashi questions the double use of "vayar - he saw".  As is his custom, the Meforash gives us an answer:

The first use of "vayar" means that he caught sight of his guests, whereas the second reference implies 'understanding'.  How so?  He first saw them standing nearby, but they were motionless.  He perceived that they were avoiding inconveniencing him, so he himself rose up with alacrity, and hastened towards them to invite them in.

An alternative explanation given by Rashi is drawn from the Gemara, in Bava Metzia.  The first segment, where it details "nitzavim alav - were standing near him" indicates their close proximity.  Curiously, this appears to be contradicted when the verse continues "vayaratz likrasam mipesach ha'ohel - he ran from the opening of the tent to greet them."  You needn't run to a person who is standing near you, just as it's unnecessary to shout while speaking if your listener is right there.  When the malachim observed Avraham adjusting his bandages, tending to the after-effects of his milah, they stepped back, literally, and distanced themselves from him.  He thereupon cut to the chase, pursuing his guests 'like there was no tomorrow', and welcomed them with a most gracious reception.  No personal pains or efforts would deter our forefather from accomplishing his cherished mitzvah!

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The following are a few thoughts of my own, as to how we can possibly apply this story, and Avraham Avinu's stellar example, to our own lives.

We are bound in love and deep dedication to Hashem and His gift to us-- our Holy Torah.  Still, mitzvos are sometimes difficult to accomplish.  It is even more of a struggle, when we feel like Hashem isn't assisting us in our efforts.  Hashem is so hidden to us in a time like that!

Picture a mother or father, teacher or Rabbi, who is quietly listening to their child or student, as they gush on with a problem or concern they've been having.  They allow the child to unburden their shoulders, hearts and minds.  As the younger one calms down, there is a moment of thoughtful silence, which is punctuated by the guiding adult with one of the following lines:  "How do you think we should proceed with this?"  "In which direction do you want to turn, and how do you want to respond to this?"  "What do you think we can do to make this better?"  Yes, they are challenging the child, but in a most profound, beautiful, and helpful way.  They do not, right off the cuff, restrict the young one to their definition of the situation, imposing upon them how the adult believes they have to change things; rather, they open and stimulate the youth's mind to accept, rationalize, feel, and process the matter, and future course of action, thoughtfully and wisely.  They encourage the child to open their ears to what their own soul advises.  (This is reminiscent of  Hashem telling Avraham "Sh'ma b'kolah - Listen to her (Sarah's) voice", her inner voice of nevua (prophecy), which was of a higher level than Avraham's.)  They nurture them to grow, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally through the rough patches of the event, and the youth becomes their own strong mentch (person), who can make their own choices, think and reflect with their own mind, and allow themselves to be directed by their inner voice.

Hashem, Avinu Shebashamayim (our Father in Heaven) may perhaps test us in the same way!  We see this with our above story from the parsha:  Avraham longed for guests, to perform the coveted mitzvah of hachnasas orchim.  Hashem rewarded him with this opportunity, sending him the angels in human guise, to care for and make his mark on.  We know Avraham was going through a difficult situation of his own-- that very day was one of the most (physically) painful days of his entire life!  And you know what?  Hashem 'distanced Himself' (in a way, through His messengers), not pressing down upon Avraham with the obligation of welcoming guests (although it was a passion of his).  He moved the mitzvah further off, so to speak, and this ultimately compelled Avraham to make greater efforts to accomplish it.  It was Avraham's choice to rise up from the pain, making a conscious choice to pursue the opportunity, ran towards it with all his strength, and became even greater through his actions.  He passed on this strength to us, through 'spiritual DNA', to always be able to stretch ourselves, to think, to love, to struggle, to act, no matter how difficult.

Yes, mitzvos can sometimes be a challenge for us.  But we have the strengths, the mind, heart and soul, to combat any deterrent, and to forge on with the holy path.  Hashem is just giving us some room to run... and grow. 

"B'rav Am Hadras HaMelech..." -- A Stunning First-Person Account

BS"D

Yesterday, at shul, I was blessed to witness something downright stunning.

I think it was after the Kriah, when all present in shul rose up, that I looked around at who was there.  

What met my eyes was incredible; the shul was fuller than I've seen it in a very long time.  And who was the crowd constituted of?  Yidden and a few gentiles (people looking into Judaism, and a guest of my aunt's), Sefardim and Ashkenazim, converts, Baalei Teshuvah, frum-from-births, and all ages from babies to seniors.

Our community's rabbi pointed out yesterday, before reading the Haftorah, that this piece from Navi speaks about the sole mission of all mankind:  to know and proclaim Hashem's existence, sovereignty, and glory. 

How this call of the Navi was reflected in those very moments by the congregation, was shocking.  Moshiach is most surely on our threshold!  To quote a beautiful song my friend Noam Wolf wrote:  "Waiting and waiting and waiting some more, but I know you'll be here, to open the door." 

I also remembered a lesson connecting last's week's parsha of Noach with Lech Lecha.  The Dor HaFlaga (Generation of the Dispersal) gathered and joined forces from the 70 nations (who would afterwards be dispersed), and they sought to achieve a unified goal:  "Na'aseh Lanu Sheim - To make a name for ourselves".  But what was G-d's issue with this?  It was because their efforts still bore the traces of avodah zarah, that hadn't been totally washed away with the Dor HaMabul (Generation of the Flood).  They wanted to make a name for themselves, and establish their legacy.  This gross act of self-aggrandizement and self-centeredness was truly defiance, in essence, of Hashem.  They had their own agenda, and Hashem was either being battled against, or pushed out of the picture.  This is what the nations put their energies towards.  Who could possibly rise up and counter these vain and destructive ideologies?  The solution was a man who strove and struggled to create a legacy-- for Hashem.  A man who spent his entire life in coming to know and be a vessel and chariot for Hashem.  A man, who also erected monuments, altars (instead of towers), and vayikra b'sheim Hashem - He called out in the name of Hashem!

This was Avraham Avinu, who spread knowledge of Hashem as the One and Only G-d, to the entire world.

And indeed, this is what was taking place in our little shul yesterday.  "B'rav-am hadras haMelech - The King's glory is in a multitude of people" {Mishlei/Proverbs 14:28}.  The soul of Avraham Avinu (and Sarah Imeinu!) was coursing through the sanctuary, resonating powerfully in every breath and every word that was given forth.  So many different people, from so many backgrounds, and even a couple from different faiths-- a microcosm of the enormous and vibrant span of humanity-- but all were united in a house of G-d, calling out b'Sheim Hashem!

Parshat Lech Lecha: Tied to the Prize

BS"D

Good Shabbos to all dear readers!

I dedicate this parsha post as a zechus for a refuah sheleimah for Reb Yehoshua Refael HaLevi ben Yocheved.

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Let's open up to Chamishi, the fifth Aliyah of this week's sidra of Lecha Lecha:

"Vayomer Melech S'dom el-Avram 'ten-li hanefesh v'har'chush kach-lach.'  Vayomer Avram el-Melech S'dom 'harmosi yadi el-Hashem Keil Elyon Konei shamayim va'aretz.  Im-michut v'ad s'roch na'al v'im ekach mikal asher lach v'lo tomar 'ani he'esharti et-Avram'.' -- The King of S'dom said to Avram 'Give me the people, and take the spoils for yourself.'  Avram said to the King of S'dom 'I have lifted my hand to G-d the Most High Almighty, Possessor of heaven and earth.  Neither a thread nor a shoelace; I will not take anything of yours, so you will not be able to say 'I made Avram wealthy'.'"  {Bereishis 14:21-23}

Perhaps a little bit of a back-story will be of assistance.  For twelve years, a group of five kings, including the royalty of Sodom and Gomorra, served a certain King Kederlaomer.  In the thirteenth year of their service, they decided they had had enough, and asserted themselves in rebellion against the king who held mastery over them.  Kederlaomer  entered into an alliance with three other powerful kings, and war was waged.  The lesser team of four overcame the band of five, who fled in terror to the mountains, leaving behind their wealth, which was of course usurped by their opponents, and their subjects, who were taken captive.  However...  the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah never made it to the mountains; but rather, in their flight, they became entrapped in the deadly mortar pits which abounded the land.  As the battle raged, one of its survivors (according to Midrash, as brought down by Rashi, this was the giant Og who survived the Mabul) came to Avraham and relayed an unfortunate message:  Avraham's nephew and kinsman Lot, who had claimed land and established his camps and flocks near S'dom, had been taken captive along with the rest of the conquered city.  With the greatest brotherly love, Avraham quickly shifted into action with a legion of 318 trained men (but Chazal maintain just his servant Eliezer, who possessed tremendous strength, and whose name has the gematria of 318!), set off in pursuit against the enemy-- Kederlaomer and his allies, who sacked his nephew's home, and the dwelling of so many others.  Avraham succeeded, aided by the miracles and grace of G-d, and passed with flying colors.  On his mission, he also rescued the King of S'dom, who miraculously survived the mortar pits and reunited him with his kingdom.  After these events, all of the battle-weary gathered in Eimek Hamelech (the King's Valley), and were met with sustenance of bread and wine.   Furthermore, in accordance with the Midrash's understanding, all the masses present unanimously declared Avraham a prince of Hashem and noble leader.  After being blessed by Malki-Tzedek (who was in fact Sheim ben Noach), the Kohein, the King of S'dom made the above proposal as given over in the verses.

The king only requested of Avraham to return his people to him, but he was welcome to the reward of the spoils of war.  This appears to be quite friendly and generous, so we may initially be surprised when recounting our forefather's vehement refusal.

But perhaps we shouldn't be. 

Avraham perceived a danger here.  If he was to accept the wealth that the king offered to him as a gift, the king could grow an inclination to boast that 'It was I who made Avram wealthy.'  This could ultimately lead to a Chillul Hashem, a desecration of G-d Name.  To counter any possibility of this coming to pass, Avraham declared "Harimosi yadi el Hashem Keil Elyon - I lift my hand to Hashem, the Most High Almighty"; and this, Rashi says "Lashon shevua - This is an expression of an oath."  What was Avraham Avinu vowing over?  He clarifies and emphasizes: "Konei shamayim va'aretz - Possessor of heaven and earth!"  He publicly attested that the heavens and earth were all in Hashem's ownership, so certainly even something as small as a thread or shoelace was as well.  For what could man give him that would mean anything or be of any value, when Hashem Himself, Ribbono Shel Olam and Makor (Source) of All promised him wealth, saying "V'avarech'cha - And I will bless you" (according to Rashi, this clause of the blessing refers specifically to material wealth).  And of course, who but G-d can also bless with spiritual abundance?!

Avraham desired to make it clear to the world that it is only G-d who can give blessing, and only from Him does all wealth and benefit come.  He sought to shatter any illusion that man had any real power to enrich, for this, too, is totally in G-d's hands.  As I type this, I think about a pasuk in the Gemara (Eruvin) that says:  "Omeres yonah lifnei Hakadosh Baruch Hu:  Ribono Shel Olam, yihyu mezonosai m'rurim kazayis Beyadecha v'al yihyu m'tukim kid'vash al yedei basar vadam -- The dove requested of the Holy One, Blessed be He:  Master of the Universe, may my food be as bitter as an olive, but dependent upon You, rather than sweet as honey but dependent upon flesh and blood."  He avoided becoming entrapped, indebted to a mortal king and tied to material abundance.  If only more of our world and society today the same strength and understanding. 

Too often do people become work-addicts, enslaved to their jobs in a draining and self-harmful frenzy to make a couple more bucks...  They tragically forget that regardless of how many hours they crunch, it is ultimately up to Hashem how much is a success at the end of the day.  Of course we must invest responsibility and effort-- "man was made to toil!"-- but Hashem is our partner in all business, and He holds sway over any projects, determining whether or not they will succeed and fruit.  Too often it happens, that people idolize objects and physicality with worshipping language and obsessions.  A person in that case becomes distracted, misled off a good path, and neglects making the most of their time and life.  Desensitized to something deeper and more real, their sights are limited in a tunnel-vision.  It becomes impossible for them to focus in the right way on growing themselves as people, bettering the world around them, and focusing on long-term goals and less transient pleasures.  A wonderful anonymous quote reflecting this thought:  "People were created to be loved.  Objects were created to be used.  The reason the world is in chaos is because objects are being loved and people are being used."  Only when material blessings and fortune are used in accordance with what they were created for, can they really bring long lasting joy and connection with G-d, with others, and even with yourself. 

Also keep in mind the teaching, that G-d abundantly blesses one who doesn't pursue.  Avraham didn't covet wealth, and in fact humbly shunned it even from a king whose life he saved!  But Hashem assured him great wealth.  Shaul, the first king of Israel, hid when he was to be crowned, out of his tremendous humility.  Hashem then caused him to be showered with great honors and celebration.  King Shlomo requested only wisdom from Hashem, to lead his people in the proper way.  Wisdom, but not wealth.  Wisdom, but not long life, and so forth.  And Hashem rewarded him with all of the precious blessings.

Have faith, and know that your are protected and sustained in all your ways by Hashem.  Acknowledge that all blessing comes from Him, and Him alone, even when sent through a messenger.  And you will have made a few of the most vital steps on your path to knowing G-d.

Parashas Noach: Don't Let The World Tell You What To Do.

Parashas Noach: 

Don't Let The World Tell You What To Do.

In this week's Parsha, we learn about an incredible man: Noach. The Torah says about him:

"Noach was a Tzaddik. He was [like a] perfect [man] in his generations; Noach walked with God." (Barashis 6:9) Now we don't really realize how hard that was! The Torah says later on "the earth was corrupt before God, and the earth became full of robbery." (Barashis 6:11) Imagine! Everybody on earth is robbers and liars. How would that have an influence on everybody else? A very bad one indeed. Yet the Torah says that "Noach was a Tzaddik." Do we really know what that means? The Torah said before, in the last Parasha, that "Noah was six hundred years old, and the flood came about, water upon the earth." (Barashis 7:6) That means that for five hundred years, Noach ignored the bad around him, and only focused on G-D! What is the lesson from this? From Noach, we learn not to let our bad surroundings influence us. For if we do, we would be just like the people in Noach's times. By not letting our bad surroundings influence us, not only are we not able to let other negative surrounds influence us but we could even influence others!  Through this, may we prepare the world for the coming of Mashiach, may it happen now!!!

Parshat Noach: "Whatever Floats Your Boat..?"

BS"D

Good Shabbos!

I dedicate this parsha-post l'ilui nishmas all those who tragically perished in the recent California wildfires, and as a zechus for brachos, yeshua, refuah, nechama, koach and achdus, for their survivors and those who are rebuilding their homes and lives.

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YOU ARE THERE...

The entire world population is corrupt in all their ways.  Civilization is crumbling.  Murder and all sorts of unspeakable acts are rampant among the cruel and base.  The world is devoid of holiness, and the Creator has been forgotten.  Any and all foundations and traces of morality and humanity have been dissolved in the world.  That is, with the exception of your righteous family.  Wickedness and degeneracy press in from all sides, raging constantly outside your door, but you stand strong against the current.  You know there is a one and only G-d, and you desire only His ways.  These days, the darkness and destruction is so great, that G-d comes to you, with very grave news.  "And Hashem regretted that He had made man upon the earth, and He became grieved in His heart. {Bereishis 6:6}"  He tells you...

"Va'Ani hin'ni mayvi et-ha'mabul mayim al-ha'aretz l'shacheit kol-basar asher-bo ruach chaim mitachas hashamayim kol asher-ba'aretz yigva -- And I, behold I am bringing the flood, water upon the earth, to destroy all flesh in which there is the spirit of life, from beneath the heavens; all that is upon the earth will perish." {6:17}

What do you do?

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In truth, one could respond with various reactions.  Upon learning that finally, at last, you would be swept up and away from the corruption, bloodshed, and evil, that you would no longer suffer and struggle to faithfully maintain your morals, and that justice would be meted out... wouldn't you rejoice?  Or would you go into shock at such a serious change in G-d's judgement of the human race?  Or would it perhaps be possible to even feel pity, even for the greatest reshaim, as they were about to be hurled into total annihilation?

When being made aware of G-d's choice to destroy the world by inundating it with the waters of the Flood, Noach is criticized by Chazal and Meforshim, for remaining passive in response to the fatal future of the people.  They level against him the examples of Avraham Avinu and Moshe Rabbeinu.  The former actually contended with G-d to save the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah, in the merit of the tzadikim who dwelt there.  Ultimately, Avraham's assertions didn't prevail, and G-d destroyed the two sinful cities.  However, Avraham's profound haggling with Hashem made an impression, and left an indelible mark on the message of prayers and compassion.  The same praise can be applied to the latter, Moshe Rabbeinu; for after the Cheit Eigel Hazahav (Sin of the Golden Calf), G-d was furious with the serious failure of His newborn People.  He pledged to wipe them out, and to crown Moshe as the sole nation and legacy of Israel, but that is not what Moshe sought.  He acknowledged the error that had been committed, but he still argued for the preservation of the people, and his prayer was not without great Mesiras-Nefesh.  He said "V'atah im-tisa chatasa v'im-ayin m'chaini na misifracha asher kasavta - Now if you will forgive their sin-- but if not, erase me from the Book which You have written! {Shemos 32:32}"  He pleaded with Hashem until He forgave His children.  Both Avraham and Moshe took action, spoke up, and prayed fervently on the behalf of others... even if the individuals who would benefit from their prayers left much to be desired.

Noach accepted the gezeirah faithfully, but on the other hand approached the matter with an attitude of "whatever floats Your boat, G-d" (pun intended!).  Avraham Avinu and Moshe Rabbeinu, certainly not any less faithful, took the opposite route and protested against Hashem's negative decrees.  They weren't going to go along quietly with the plan, for they had unshakeable belief in G-d's ultimate goodness.  He could guide anyone to the highest levels of wisdom and holiness.  They knew His compassion, forgiveness, and faith in the potential of mankind transcended any boundary.  So arguing with G-d?  Perhaps it's a higher level of emunah than we realize.  R' Tzvi Freeman perfectly captures these epic moments and their eternal message in his Daily Dose of Wisdom, please see here and here.

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We still might feel inclined to ask, just where we should draw the line, between passive, quiet acceptance of G-d's will, and crying out to him in prayerful plea or protest.

A person might become angry or depressed when they feel that G-d is ignoring their prayers.  A bit of enlightenment on this, in a quote from the Ponovezher Rav, R' Yosef Shlomo Kahaneman ZT"L:  "We think that when our prayers go unanswered, G-d wasn't responsive to us.  In truth, He was.  He responded, "No!"  I'll admit that this piece of honest irony gave me a smile, as well as much to think about.  But when G-d answers "No", how does one proceed?  One must keep praying, of course!  G-d might not grant us our plea, because we might not be asking for what's right for us; but He also might put off His response, so to speak, when we're not praying with the fullest kavanah, or if we haven't reached our greatest prayer-potential.  This is why He withheld children from Avraham and Sarah, Yitzchak and Rivkah, Rochel and Chana.  He knew that the intensity, perseverance, and faith, that permeated their continuous prayers, would shape and refine them into even greater Tzadikim and forbears.  He desired their righteous prayers greatly.

But once Hashem's decree has come to pass, we do not pray to Him to halt or relieve us of it any longer.  This is explained in Mishna Berachos {Perek 9, Mishna 3}:

"Ha'tzo'aik l'she'avar, harei zo tefilas shav.  Kaitzad?  Haiysa ishto m'uberes, v'amar: 'Y'hi ratzon shetayled ishti zachar,' harei zo tefilas shav.  Hayah va vaderech v'shama kol tz'vacha ba'ir, v'amar: 'Y'hi ratzon shelo yihyu eilu bnei vaisi,' harei zo tefilas shav. -- (If) one prays regarding the past, this is a prayer in vain.  How so?  (If) one's wife was pregnant, and he said 'May it be (G-d's) will that my wife will give birth to a male,' this is a prayer in vain.  (If) one was coming along the road, and he heard the sound of screaming in the city, and he said 'May it be (G-d's) will that those (who are screaming) not be (members of) my household,' this is a prayer in vain."

The first example given is in the case of the unborn baby's gender having already been determined.  A continued prayer for a certain child is pointless after this finalization, so you wouldn't pray to G-d to change the developing child after the fact.  Similarly, in the case of the second example; whoever made the outcry, whether it be a stranger or a household member, has already been met with the unfortunate occurrence.  A prayer can't go back in time and change the past.  Once Hashem causes to pass whatever He wills for so-and-so, whether it be positive or negative, we must accept it with humility and submissiveness.  We assume a certain passivity, similar to Noach.  Hashem's wisdom and reasoning behind what He causes to happen is usually beyond us, and for whatever He made His ratzon, we have to try to see the bigger picture, and understand that this, too, is for the ultimate good, and part of the Master Plan.

On the flip side of the coin...

We can certainly pray for anything before the fact, and of course during any course of events for guidance and clarity to deal with it.  We were given a voice as a tool in the service of Hashem.  We are reminded of this frequently when we recite the verse {Tehillim 51:17} before the Amida "Ado-nai s'fasai t'fitach, u'fi yagid t'hilasecha -- My Lord, open my lips, that my mouth may declare Your praise".  We are indeed as nothing before Hashem in prayer, so we must ask Him to instill within us with the inspiration to simply speak, and to allow His energy and words to flow through the vessel that we make ourselves into; thus we pray to open our lips with "Your praise".  Like a person who speaks meanwhile deeply focused on an idea or teaching, he speaks without selectivity or calculation, but his words just flow forth like water, so it should be with us when we are immersed in tefillah.  A most beautiful insight, drawn from Chabad.org's Online Siddur with Commentary, jewels of Chassidus, that I credit to Mrs. Nechama Laber for teaching me just yesterday morning.  Perhaps I digressed slightly, but this insight also emphasizes how we are created to praise G-d.  Also, praying to Hashem in fact is one of the greatest ways of revealing Him in this world!  Please see here for further elaboration on this subject.

You may have been visited before by the question of "Why does G-d need my tefillos anyway?"  In truth, He doesn't require our prayers, but He loves them and is awaiting them nonetheless.  We need to pray; our davening changes us, and molds us into greater, more conscious and connected beings, and also has a profound effect on the world around us.  Tefillah is a gift for every person, for every occasion and all time.  It's a treasure and bond that can never be expropriated from us.  Chazal (our Sages) teach us, that 'even if a sword is at your throat, do not cease your prayers,' for Hashem can make a miracle occur at any moment, even until the last.  Perhaps Yogi Bera was channeling Chazal when he famously said "It ain't over 'til it's over...  Hopefully, it will not take something so drastic for us to realize the relevance and constancy of prayer.  Nothing is too small to request; what we can offer thanks for is limitless; and praise is a precious purpose  that is ours to fulfill. 

Be unafraid to assert yourself on behalf of others, emulating Avraham and Moshe.  Don't forget to use your voice to pray for those in distress, for those who are facing great challenges in life, and for those who just need a little spark of joy, life, and inspiration, to reach the heights for which they were created to achieve.

Passivism or protestation...  Ultimately, is one approach better that the other?  I leave the question to you.

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One last Chiddush on tefillah, and a lesson that can be drawn from a seemingly technical detail on the teiva (ark):

First, the Chiddush drawn from R' Tzvi Freeman's Daily Dose, entitled "The Ark":  There is a violent sea storm raging.  The waves are hurling, and their mighty force leaves a wake of destruction.  The relentless waves are the struggles and stresses of fighting to maintain a livelihood, of not knowing which direction to turn, or not knowing what lays ahead, and the indecision and insecurities...  They churn in a confusion of opposites in temperature and bearing.  But how can you save yourself from this sorry fate, from being storm-tossed any longer in these suffocating currents?  Mirror Noach, and create for yourself an ark.  The Hebrew word for "an ark" is "teiva," which curiously means "a word" as well, in Lashon haKodesh.  Your ark, your ticket to personal salvation, shall be your words of prayer and reflection.  Enter into your ark; ease yourself into the other world of your mindful, prayerful moment; let it surround you with its safety and security; and allow it to lift you up upon the rushing waters, instead of letting them drag you down and drown you.

The second, is an insight of my own connecting R' Freeman's wisdom from the Rebbe, to a Rashi on this parsha:  Hashem instructs Noach to build the ark {Bereishis 6:14-16}, and describes the size requirements in pasuk 15:

"'V'zeh asher ta'aseh osah shalosh mei'os amah orech hateiva chamishim amah rachba ushloshim amah komasa -- And this [is the size] you shall make it: three hundred cubits the length of the ark, fifty cubits its breadth, and thirty cubits its height.'"

We learn from here that the ark was thirty cubits (approximately 45 feet) tall.  Now, let's jump forward in the sidra to the commencement of the Great Flood:

"Vay'hi Mabul arba'im yom al-ha'aretz v'yirbu hamayim vayisu aet-hateiva vataram may'al ha'aretz. -- Now the Flood was forty days upon the earth, and the waters increased, and they lifted the ark, and it rose off the earth." {Bereishis 7:17}

Rashi comments on the clause "vataram may'al ha'aretz - and it rose off the earth," and he explains that even as the teiva rose up with the ever-increasing water's surface, the lower 11 cubits remained submerged beneath the surface, like any loaded ship worth its salt.  This indicates that 19 cubits still reached above the water.  But never mind the numbers-- I'm not one much for arithmetic.  What intrigues me is the fact that a measure of the ship was indeed surrounded by the great deep.  For if the ark is a symbol of our prayer, which delivers us from being completely drowned by the hustle and trials of making a living, perhaps this 'minor' detail Rashi brings into focus, can remind us that even in the workspace, even in the midst of a busy, hectic setting or crunching hour, we can still break out into prayer to our King.  At any time, in any place, forever and always.  He's waiting to hear it.  And we're secretly yearning to let it burst forth.